sirtin death

Definitely a groaner, but you know you are going to use it.

2007-08-03T15:57:00.001-05:00

Someone stole the toilet from the local precinct. The police have nothing to go on.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

2007-07-23T08:40:00.000-05:00

Waiting in line at midnight to get a book that you can just walk in and pick up the next morning? no thanks.

However, we did pre-order two copies from amazon, but when the pokey UPS driver hadn't shown up by 9:15am we drove to Barnes and Noble to get a couple of copies. This was a good thing since we hired a babysitter for the day so that my wife and I could read all day and the books didn't show up until 1:30PM! That being said, book was good. Finished it on Sunday. No spoilers here.

Why breeding should be a privelege and not a right:

2007-07-17T08:53:00.002-05:00

http://cbs2.com/local/local_story_197201156.html

At the end of the article it says she MIGHT face charges. wha?

Yet Another Movie Review (YAMR):

2007-07-17T08:53:00.001-05:00

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix = bleh

Quote of the day (no context will be provided):

2007-07-13T10:06:00.001-05:00

"When the police would arrive, right away they would put out a wiener and a marshmallow and they would say it was for recreational purposes"

Another Movie Review:

2007-07-12T13:29:00.000-05:00

Live Free or Die Hard = Another Die Hard Movie

To blog or not to blog....

2007-07-11T10:07:00.000-05:00

...no promises, but I might post more. And to start with here is a movie review:

Transformers = Awesome.

Ants may be annoying little devils, but...

2006-05-23T09:17:00.000-05:00

this is just too cool.

Not quite what I was looking for Google....

2006-05-08T09:19:00.000-05:00

Searching for some Pyrex casserole dishes resulted in the following hit....

"Frequently Asked Questions About Pyrex Glass Sex Toys, Dildos ... "

Apparently the executives at Corning don't get out much.

Wii

2006-04-28T08:48:00.000-05:00

I am sad, that is all.

Can you say "Lucky"?

2006-04-24T09:32:00.000-05:00

We have two cats. One of them named Lucky. Our son, being just over two, does not quite pronounce this correctly. It's nothing bad, it just sounds like "Kucky". Last night as we were putting the little boy to bed he made some comment about the cat and used his normal phrasing.

He is at an age were asking, "Can you say "? will often get him to repeat what you said, usually with amazing accuracy (he said "Accomidating" yesterday!). So, my wife asked him, "Can you say "Lucky"?

"Fucky"

What's worse than "Smelly Cat"?

2006-04-19T09:23:00.000-05:00

Last night we were settling down to watch one of the two television shows we follow. As the TV turned on there was a repeat of Friends on and Phoebe had her guitar out. My son sees this and starts saying, "Song! Song!". Knowing it would probably be somewhat of an odd tune, but knowing the little boy would not care I figured we'd let him enjoy whatever she was about to sing. This was before the first line issued forth from the television...

"Jingle Bitch Screwed Me..." MUTE!

An observation from parenthood:

2006-04-17T17:10:00.000-05:00

Entropy is the toddler of the universe.

I can't do it cap'n. I don't have the POWER!

2006-03-31T08:47:00.000-06:00

We may be close to losing one of our favorite smart-ass comments. Always a sad day. When luddites complain about batteries and having to plug things in, geeks are often overheard to tell them to go get some of that wireless power. Well...now they can.

From the why didn't I do that first department...

2006-03-23T09:19:00.000-06:00

There really isn't anything more to say about this one.

WARNING: you may have nightmares from this one

2006-03-21T08:36:00.000-06:00

If the thought of Disney's Nemo on Ice isn't frightening enough...well, the visuals just bring it home.

Excuse me while I...

2006-03-20T21:26:00.000-06:00

The Motive: Victoria's Secret. For some males of the species the thought of this store can be quite frightening. They want to go in and ogle the product, but don't want to be seen wanting to go in to ogle the product. It can be a major step in the maturing of a boy into a man, the ability to walk into this den of lace and half naked displays with your head held high. Next time you happen to be stopping in take the time to look at all the men's faces. There will be some that are secure enough to not be bothered, but the vast majority will usually be quite uncomfortable. Where is this going you ask?

The Means: Well, a little more background first. My 2 year old son is in the process of potty training. Actually, he is mostly there. We are confident enough in his ability to hold himself that we now take him out in thick cotton underwear rather than a diaper. On the particular day in question, he was wearing said undergarments and a pair of cotton drawstring shorts.

The Opportunity: My wife needed to do some shopping. One of the stores as you may have gathered at this point she wanted to visit was Victoria's Secret. So, in we went. I held my head high (thank you very much) and wheeled my son inside in his stroller. Now you would not expect a two year old to have entered that gangly age at which this store would be an issue. It wasn't. A pair of cotton drawstring shorts are not the most covering of clothing. And a pair of cotton underwear isn't as restrictive as a diaper. With a big grin on his face, smiling up at the clerk, he whipped it out.

Now, before the police show up and arrest us for something...he needed to use the restroom and was simply letting us know.

Massive Multiplayer Boggle!

2006-03-20T14:44:00.000-06:00

Why the heck not.

What if Micro$oft made the made the ipod...

2006-03-15T08:45:00.000-06:00

Last month Eggshells and Miracle Grow posted a link to a video poking fun at Micro$oft and what would happen had they designed the packaging for the iPod. Quite funny. Well, as it turns out Micro$oft is the source of the video. Kudos for being able to poke fun at themselves.

Is it a vase or two faces?

2006-03-14T09:05:00.000-06:00

Both!

The virtual end of my life...

2006-03-13T16:16:00.000-06:00

whenever this is released I will dissapear from the face of the planet. But feel free to contact me via your own little world. I knew it was going to be cool, but this is going to be the best video game of all time.

SPORE

Scared of Bird Flu?

2006-03-01T10:12:00.000-06:00

Apparently they are in Hanoi. New billboards have appeared which supposedly translate roughly to: "To minimise the chance of contracting bird flu, please cook the absolute crap out of all poultry!"

Einstein was a genius after all

2006-02-24T09:03:00.001-06:00

Try your own!

The brilliance of sports commentary

2006-02-24T09:03:00.000-06:00

We all know the vast majority of sports commentators have a collective IQ only measurable with a micrometer. To illustrate this I submit a quote from one of the numbskulls speaking during last night's figure skating event at the olympics. Just in case you don't know, the figure skating competition is in two parts, the short program and the long program. This particular speaker thought it necessary to differentiate between the two with this gem:

"The difference between the long program and the short program is the long program is longer."

This is why all physicists are nuts

2006-02-23T15:52:00.000-06:00

I love this line: "Although a photon can occupy multiple places simultaneously, it can only make an actual appearance at one location."

This post was created by causing a superposition of a photon writing and not writing this post. I got information regarding the content of this post without ever writing it.

In short...

sirtin was here
sirtin was not here

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

2006-02-22T16:32:00.000-06:00

Just had to get that off my chest.

I'll take 2

2006-02-17T15:36:00.000-06:00

Holy Freaking Plamsa Batman!

Out of Context quote of the "day"

2006-02-16T08:52:00.000-06:00

"They are moving around 55km a year on average, which is a long way to hop if you are a toad," said Dr Phillips.

A good way to have your head explode...

2006-02-15T09:09:00.000-06:00

I want one.

Is that a mink in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

2006-02-15T09:06:00.000-06:00

I think it's too warm in Houston, but perhaps Sloane needs one with all that snow.

more than meets the eye...

2006-02-13T09:56:00.000-06:00

Isn't he cute?

New high bandwidth data transfer method suggested

2006-02-09T14:53:00.000-06:00

Read on to see why SNAP is better than pigeons!

Brokeback to the Future

2006-02-03T09:32:00.000-06:00

I may never be able to watch the Back to the Future movies the same way again.

Cancelled DeBeer's Ad...

2006-01-19T10:09:00.000-06:00

he he he

There are benefits...

2006-01-17T14:01:00.000-06:00

...to working in a lab where the constant noise level is 83.2 db.

mmmmmm, blissful...

Update: AAARGH! I hate the apple store. They don't understand the concept of hyperlinking stuff on their site so all you end up with is the "session timed out" garbage. Bad Apple, no cookie!

Now, for a more permanent link

Hey look! I blogged again!

2006-01-05T08:26:00.000-06:00

This is just too freaking cool. And only for $5 more! Long live Lexar!!!!

Pic-a-chuuuuu!

2005-12-22T09:25:00.000-06:00

Yes, we've all worried that this was the case, but now it has been proven. Those in charge have tried to cover it up, but it will always remain true that:

Pokemon Causes Cancer

AYEE?

2005-12-20T08:38:00.000-06:00

Sorry it's been a while since I posted, real life and stuff....

I'd just like to say, "Wankel Rotary Engine".

Thank you.

"...or I shall taunt you a second time-a!"

2005-12-05T15:21:00.000-06:00

One of the minds behind Penny Arcade has recently been granted a child. Below is one of his musings on fatherhood:

He is an arresting creature, to be sure. As most of his movements are governed by animal reflexes and whatnot, he can't really be blamed for the lion's share of his activities. This being said, anytime a person pees in your mouth it is difficult not to see it as an insult.

All Around the Particle Accelerator...

2005-12-05T09:15:00.000-06:00

Hell yeah!

Why worry? Each one of us is carrying an unlicensed nuclear accelerator on his back.

I'm taking my ball and going home!

2005-12-05T08:59:00.000-06:00

Wow.

Hours after New Orleans officials announced Tuesday that they would deploy a city-owned, wireless Internet network in the wake of Hurricane Katrina, regional phone giant BellSouth Corp. withdrew an offer to donate one of its damaged buildings that would have housed new police headquarters, city officials said yesterday.

I always knew phone companies were some of the many ugly, red, sources of all evil in the world, but this temper tantrum is just wrong.

I always find it interesting how primal a company's reaction is to developments that might nip at their business model. And this is even MORE true when that company owns a monopoly. It would seem to me that in the long run, BellSouth would be better served by the public opinion AND the bottom line if instead of crying and taking their toy away so nobody else could play with it they would, oh I don't know, offer to implement the wi-fi for the city. It might not be their primary area of expertise (that would be gouging the customer for all they can), but they are a freaking communications company, it's not that far of a leap.

Oh well, enough ranting. I don't think this textbox would hold enough characters if I started getting into all of the other companies/organizations that do this...Microsoft, AT&T in it's day, the movie and music industry, etc...

------

"The Proof is in the Spell Checker"
I just ran spell checker on this and the dictionary did not have an entry for "BellSouth". First suggestion: "bullshit"

true == funny

2005-12-02T09:48:00.000-06:00

From The Onion:

RIAA Bans Telling Friends About Songs

November 30, 2005 | Issue 41•48

LOS ANGELES—The Recording Industry Association of America announced Tuesday that it will be taking legal action against anyone discovered telling friends, acquaintances, or associates about new songs, artists, or albums. "We are merely exercising our right to defend our intellectual properties from unauthorized peer-to-peer notification of the existence of copyrighted material," a press release signed by RIAA anti-piracy director Brad Buckles read. "We will aggressively prosecute those individuals who attempt to pirate our property by generating 'buzz' about any proprietary music, movies, or software, or enjoy same in the company of anyone other than themselves." RIAA attorneys said they were also looking into the legality of word-of-mouth "favorites-sharing" sites, such as coffee shops, universities, and living rooms.

This girl has no backbone...

2005-12-02T09:46:00.000-06:00

I'm sorry, I was out the day they handed out spines.

OUCH

Out Out Damned Teenager!

2005-11-30T08:47:00.000-06:00

I think I need a battery powered, pocket sized version.

And he tested it on his KIDS!

A Sad Day

2005-11-28T11:05:00.000-06:00

'Twas the morning after Thanksgiving and all through the house
Alexander was running as quiet as a mouse...HAHAHA.

But seriously, this past Friday marks a sad day in my life. I had thought that there were some absolutes in life. Some unchangeable things that one could always count on. I was wrong.

Because I have an alarm clock without a snooze bar (which we lovingly call Alexander) and because there were a couple things at Best Buy that were on sale for freakishly good prices, the Shumways actually went shopping on Crazy-Person day. We got the car loaded and headed towards our first destination, Best Buy.

It would be safe to say that Best Buy is one of my favorite toy stores. I don't get to go as often as I like and so was looking forward to a visit this morning. I mean, this is Best Buy where almost everything needs batteries, goes beep, or requires a computer.

Alexander is sitting happily in his car seat going nuts every time he sees a tractor. Karen and I are chatting in the front. And I'm driving the car slipping into that autopilot navigation mode where you know where you are going but just not really paying attention to directions (still watching the road of course). And then it happened. My autopilot navigational system, which, let me remind you, is supposed to be taking me to BEST BUY, turns me towards

{the elderly, those with heart problems, and pregnant mothers (or fathers if you've managed) should not read past this point and go do something else }

lowes.

I weep.

How to Annoy your Neighbors

2005-11-28T09:31:00.000-06:00

Sound needed for the full experience.

Download link:
Wizards of Winter

Streaming version:
Wizards of Winter

The Uxorial Redheaded says...

2005-11-24T08:37:00.000-06:00

"My finger is a bit stiff. I think I used it too much yesterday."

Jack "Attention Whore" Thompson...

2005-11-23T13:45:00.000-06:00

...has been disbarred in Alabama! Mr. Thompson (a Florida lawyer) was part of a legal team in an Alabama case claiming that the video game (or as Mr. T would like it called - murder simulator) Grand Theft Auto was responsible for an 18 year old (Devin Moore) fatally shooting some police officers. What influence the game may have had aside, Mr. T has made quite the ass of himself throughout his career most recently creating his "Modest Proposal" where he promised $10,000 to charity if any one would create, market, and distribute his very graphic and disgusting game idea. The resulting hoopla made our dimwitted lawyer decide to withdraw himself from the case in Alabama as his presense would detract from the facts. Here's the good part. Judge James Moore decided that wasn't good enough and rejected Mr. T's voluntary removal, kicked him from the case, disbarred him in Alabama, and wrote an 18 page complaint to the Alabama Bar.

For more information on the crazy man himself you can visit the Wiki and read about such things as when he was running against Janet Reno for Dade County State Attorney he presented her with a piece of paper at a debate which read:
I, Janet Reno, am a
[] Homosexual
[] Bisexual
[] Heterosexual
and asked her to check one.

I'd like to say a few words...

2005-11-23T12:00:00.000-06:00

Strawberry.
Elephant.
Periwinkle.

Thank you.